Looking For A Flexible Bpmn / Workflow Project Management Tool For Private And Work Use

I’m looking for a tool that lets users flexibly create workflows for project management and approvals. Here’s what I’m looking for:

• Should support multiple users with role-based permissions
• Flexible workflow creation: users can build forms, approval stages, and process flows without hitting the limitations of most low-code/no-code tools
• Can be self-hosted for private use, but a paid/business edition is fine if it works well
• Should allow things like “project manager collects approvals from multiple people” and automatically routes forms/results

What I liked about Flowable (which I tested a while back):

• Drag-and-drop workflow builder
• Form creation and approval routing
• User permissions and role management
• Could replace clunky Excel/meeting-based processes for collecting data and approvals

What I’m struggling with:

• I tried running it with a compose setup about a year ago and couldn’t get it (properly) working (had some linking and menu issues, but the basics were working).
• Happy to share the compose and my specific questions if anyone can help, but the problem wasn't Docker related it was related to Flowable and the community wasn't very helpful.

Questions for the community:

• Do my requirements make sense? Should I explain in more detail?
• Does anyone have tips for getting Flowable running easily, especially with Docker/precompose?
• Any suggestions for similar tools that meet these requirements (not just generic name-drops)?

Thanks in advance!