You Can’t Automate Trust: Why I Built My Business On Relationships

I have built an entire company on being able to relationship. Yes, I said it like that on purpose.

According to Google, a relationship is “the way in which two or more concepts, or people are connected, or the state of being connected.” And while the industry is currently obsessed with AI ( I mean total obsession) on how Artificial Intelligence is going to be utilized to streamline processes, scale production, and help us grow, I’m going to tell you something that may sound old school…. Relationships are still the #1 driver of growth and sales revenue. AI can help you create the strategy. It can help you draft the outline. It can even help you write the follow-up email. But it will never solely close the deal. That part is entirely on you.

I’ve been blessed with a God-given talent to connect, and I use that strength to solve problems across marketing, social media, video, and even recruiting. Because at the end of the day, in this industry, people don’t just buy services. They buy trust. They buy confidence and they buy connection. So let me counsel you a little on how to leverage relationships to not only grow yourself, but grow your organization too.

“Show me your friends, and I’ll show you who you are.” 

My grandmother used to tell me this all the time (of course in Spanish) and boy was she right. Having the right relationships in your life, both personally and professionally, can elevate you to the next level. Most people love to show off who they’re aligned with. Whether it’s snapping a picture and posting it on social media, or dropping someone’s name when trying to make an introduction. But trust and believe, who you associate with matters in business. This is a relationship based industry. Your name, your reputation, and your character will travel into rooms before you do. And the people watching you? They’re not always who you think.

Trust is the #1 factor you need in sales. People will not do business with you, and they definitely won’t refer business to you, if they don’t trust you. So how do you gain trust? You show up, time after time. You stay consistent. And you give first. Be a giver!  Yes, you’re going to have to extend the olive branch first sometimes. Especially if you’re trying to work with high level people who already have options. Giving first shows you believe in yourself and your product. It also signals you’re not just there to take.

Let’s talk about “showing up,” because a lot of people get this wrong. Showing up doesn’t mean attending the conference and sitting in the room quietly. It also includes how you are dressed, how you present yourself, how you move, and even how you speak. Your energy introduces you before your business card does. How you speak to the wait and hotel staff at a conference will say a lot about you. The words you choose. The way you treat people who “can’t do anything for you.” All of it matters. People notice, and in an industry like ours, people talk. One of the quickest ways to damage a relationship is to be inconsistent. Don’t go back and forth. Don’t overpromise and underdeliver. Don’t talk big and move small. If you say you’re going to do something, do it. Period! Being reliable is rare these days, and that’s why it’s powerful.

Here’s another truth: people watch their competition. So if you’re doing business with someone’s competitor, trust me, they’re watching you too. This is why your integrity matters. You don’t have to play politics, but you do have to understand perception. Relationships can open doors, and they can close them just as fast.

Not all money is good money – Not everyone will do business with you, and that’s okay. For me, it’s quality over quantity, and not all money is good money. Some relationships will cost you more than they’re worth. They’ll drain your energy, your confidence, your time, and your peace. Weed those out and cut them off quickly. You do not have time to coddle relationships that aren’t adding value to you.

Which leads me to one of my favorite questions: Are you a fountain or a drain? Do people perceive you as someone who adds value to the industry? Or do they see you as someone they have to tolerate?

Try talking to the person in the corner. The quiet ones are often the most powerful people in the room. They’re observers. They retain information. And when they speak, people listen. Don’t overlook them because they aren’t the loudest. And remember, relationships can form anytime, anywhere. In the elevator. In line for coffee. Sitting next to someone you’ve never met. There is opportunity everywhere if you’re open enough to see it. I don’t believe in coincidence.

Don’t be a “mean girl” in business – This one is simple, be approachable. Be willing to invite new people into your circle. Don’t be the person giving off “you can’t sit with us” energy. That’s a major turn-off, and it’s also a sign of insecurity. Give people the opportunity to build a relationship with you and your tribe. You don’t want to be so far removed that you’re unapproachable. In this industry, being warm will take you further than being “important.” Because in the end, AI can assist us. But relationships will always lead us.

Dalila Ramos is the founder of Taco Tuesday Talks + Career Matchmaker.
This column does not necessarily reflect the opinion of HousingWire’s editorial department and its owners. To contact the editor responsible for this piece: zeb@hwmedia.com.