Father Died And Lived With His Ex Girlfriend. She Says She’s The Executor Of His Will, But He Told Me Multiple Times That I Was.

Location: Virginia

Still raw because this just happened, but trying to get some info. It Still raw because this just happened, but trying to get some help. My dad just passed away, and he had a complicated living situation where he lived with his ex (they bought a house together, and it was just easier to stay bc rates rose, the house was paid off, and they usually worked different shifts anyway).

My dad talked to me multiple times over the past year about being the executor of his will, and making sure I understood the responsibilities. He was sick, but it seemed like he was doing well and things went south VERY quickly, before I could tie up loose ends. Here’s what I know: he definitely had a will, again we talked about it a few times. So I’ve contacted the ex girlfriend (roommate) about scheduling a time to go through his belongings, mostly bc I want to take care of things like I told him I would. She said the best time would be a few days from now - not my preference but she does live there and I don’t want to impose; trying to put myself in her shoes. She also said she found his will and that he’d made her executor. That may have been true of an old version, and I mentioned that to her. I believe he said he had done the will through the legal benefits provided through his work. Would they have an updated copy? Right now I don’t have a death certificate yet - I’m his medical POA but the hospital said I need to call back about that on Monday. Any clue where / how I could find a more recent version? Should I press to go through his things sooner? Here’s where it gets even more complicated: he talked about making my brother and I the heirs to his half of their house, instead of it naturally transferring to her as the other owner. I honestly don’t care that much about the house, but this has me feeling really weird about the situation.’s enough work already trying to handle his affairs without this mess.