Ontario - How Can I Have My Spouse Leave The Home During Separation When A Child With Special Needs Is Involved?

Location: Ontario, Canada

I live in Ontario and I’m trying to understand my legal options regarding separation and custody.

I am 43 and have been married to my husband (45) for 12 years. We have a 10-year-old son who is autistic and semi-verbal. He relies heavily on routine and stability, and receives support through school as well as ABA and occupational therapy.

Over the past several years our marriage has had ongoing conflict, and recently we began discussing divorce. My husband even printed out paperwork suggesting we file jointly, but I told him I would prefer to speak with a lawyer before proceeding.

Since those conversations started, his behavior in the home has changed and his interactions with our son have become increasingly negative. When our son approaches him (for example bringing a book or asking for a hug), he is often told to leave the room and occasionally spoken to in a very discouraging way about his autism.

This has had a noticeable impact on my son’s emotional regulation. Recently when returning home he refused to enter the house and had a prolonged meltdown, which is unusual for him. Because of his autism, maintaining a stable environment and routine is extremely important.

For that reason, I am trying to avoid moving my son out of the home if possible. His school, therapies, and support network are all tied to our current location.

My main questions are:

• Is it possible in Ontario to legally require or request that one spouse leave the marital home during a separation?
• If so, what type of court order or legal process is typically involved?
• What type of documentation should I begin collecting regarding parenting responsibilities and my son’s care?
• Would letters or documentation from his school, ABA therapists, or occupational therapist be relevant in custody discussions?
• Does the fact that I am the primary caregiver for a child with special needs typically factor into custody decisions?

For context, I currently manage almost all of my son’s daily care, appointments, therapy coordination, and school communication.

I briefly consulted a lawyer but the conversation was short and dismissive and I am planning to seek a second opinion. In the meantime, I am trying to understand the general legal process and what steps I should begin preparing for.

Any guidance on the legal aspects of separation, the marital home, and custody in Ontario would be greatly appreciated.