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Child Support Question

Location: Pennsylvania

Need some advice before I decide if I’m going to file for child support or not.

I’m in PA and he’s in Iowa. We have 1 child who is 9. No formal court ordered custody or child support. He hasn’t seen his child since March 2025 by his choice.

So when we first split up 3 years ago we agreed on $1000 a month. A few months later he complained so we dropped it to $900. A year later he complained and it’s been $600 since. It was all outside of courts, just an agreement between us.

In September he stopped paying because he was out of work because he got hurt. I was understanding and didn’t ask for any help in the meantime even though I’ve been struggling without it. Once a month I’ve asked for an update to see if he was back to work or anything. Always not back and no update on when he could pay. Come to today. I ask again. He says he’s been back a few weeks now and is not making as much as he made before and we will need to figure something out cause he won’t pay the $600 anymore that we agreed to.

I told him I thought it was best we go through the courts for it because then we can’t argue anymore about it and it’s all up to them. Now he’s angry and making me feel guilty about it. I had bad anxiety and he knows that so I think he may be just playing the guilt card cause it’s always worked before, hence me continuing to agree on lowering the amounts.

What should I do?

submitted by /u/Bears-Beets-Becca
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Child Support Question

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