Broke Up With With My Ex-fiancé And Received A Letter Threatening To Come After Me For $30k Since We Were In A “committed Intimate Relationship” -m

Location: Washington State

Length of relationship: 7 years

Length of engagement: 2 years, without any definitive plans to marry

It’s been about seven months since the breakup and I received this letter a few days ago. He gave me one week to respond before he “proceeds with filing.” I’m 99% sure he’s heavily relied on ChatGPT for this information. It is formally written and professional.

He is hurting for money. He’s never been financially stable (my mistake being with him for so long). I have worked hard and have a stable career, essentially supporting the relationship financially while he got to start his own business. He had an opportunity to be a carpenter but wanted to start a business instead. I wanted to be a good partner and support him in his endeavors.

Now he’s coming after me and everything I’ve earned.

I’m paying the mortgage now on my own without any help.

Backstory:

- I paid for my house with my own money, he did not contribute to the down payment at all. The mortgage is in my name.

- We did significant improvement on the landscaping on the house. He claims this was “100 hours of work priced at $50/hr”

- Utilities, alarm system, pet bills & insurance are all in my name

- He would pay me “mortgage” via Venmo every month. I had to remind him over and over again to pay monthly living expenses via Venmo, which were often split into numerous payments because of his lack of cash.

- He paid for electricity to be installed in the garage, so he could start his business there. He says this is due to him for $5000

- He owes me $3k and didn’t mention that in the letter

- He states that the principal (equity) he’s owed is $10k

- He states that the non-equity portion of mortgage contributions is $10k

- We did not have joint bank accounts

All of this based on the fact that Washington recognizes a Committed Intimate Relationship (CIR).

I have not been served any papers. I’m going to call another lawyer tomorrow for a consultation. In the end, he states “If you’d like to discuss settlement or mediation before then, let me know.”

Any advice or recommendations or words of wisdom (besides the obvious - don’t move in with a narcissistic psychopath) would be greatly appreciated