Extended Family Is Threatening Legal Action Over Funds Used With Explicit Permission

Location: Nevada

Hello, this is my first time posting to this sub and I was really hoping it wouldn’t come to this. Please bear with me as I have to omit personally identifying information, and I am doing my best to describe the situation as non-partially as I can given the circumstances. My mom asked me to post this on her behalf, but this effects me too.

Over the past 10 years, my immediate family has lived with my grandmother. She is over 80 years old and has required assistance in living. We have been watching after her and caring for her and she has done the same for us in other ways. Currently, there is 3 of us apart from my grandmother, and 2 of us are adults.

We shop for her (food, amenities, whatever else she may ask for). We take care of her physically (ensuring she has help in an emergency, feeding her daily, taking her to her appointments, etc.) The adults in the house ensure she is well taken care of and if we were not here, she would likely need to live in an assisted living facility of sorts or need to be moved out of her own house (which she does NOT want.) She is still lucid but sundowns, and she has not been declared mentally incompetent.

On the other hand, my grandmother has provided us with money and shelter. Over 10 years, there has been about $50k of money that my family has used with her explicit permission (with a lot of it also being purchases made on her behalf). However, she would also fund things such as entertainment, education, and emergencies that would occur within my immediate family—AGAIN, with the money only used with explicit permission from herself. Currently we have paid her back $10k but there remains the discrepancy.

I only know these numbers because my extended family, including my grandmother’s executor of her trust as well as her other children, have been threatening legal action against my mother for the $50k. They claim that despite 1) using the money with my grandmother’s permission, 2) my mom and I being her caregivers (not to mention my late grandfather’s!) for the past 10 years, and 3) my grandmother not WANTING them to take legal action, that my mom stole this money from my grandma. They’re concerned about the amount of money that will be split once my grandma (who is in sublime health, currently) passes away.

My mom is understandably scared of them taking legal action. My grandmother had signed the over the title of her car to my mom, and my mom was pressured into signing it over to the executor despite the car not being included in my grandmother’s trust because of them threatening legal action if she didn’t comply.

My mom feels unsafe in this house. She told them she was moving out and they threatened to call the police on her. We have no idea what to do. Without my grandmother’s financial support, which we have been living without for months now, my mom has nothing, and I don’t make enough to be able to help her.

Again, to reiterate, my grandma WANTS to stay in her own house. She WANTS my mom and I to continue to take care of her. She would never ask my mother for a cent, and she wants these people to leave my family alone as much as I do. My extended family is acting against my grandmother’s wishes when it comes to everything, but I really don’t know if that makes a difference from a legal standpoint. That is why I come here.

Is there ANYTHING that we can do in order to better this situation? Namely, is there anything that my mom can do? Is my extended family in the right? Thank you for your time.

EDIT: sorry he is NOT the POA. he is the executor of her trust. thanks