Messy Estate

Location: Washington State

My grandmother died in February 2022.

In September 2022 my grandfather got $1.43 million from my grandma's sister's estate.

March 2023, my grandfather (87) met a woman online, we'll call her Debbie (50). She was using her sister's profile on a dating website. She comes clean that she wasn't the one in the picture right before they get ready to meet. By June, they had moved in together about an hour south of me. Their relationship was a roller coaster which I have documentation of via texts. Also in this time, he falls and breaks his hand. He fell a second time not long after and we thought he was going to die due to the injuries but he recovered.

I learned her real name in July, and the first article when searching brings up how she had stolen $600k from an elderly man with dementia. I immediately bring this up to my grandpa, and he says she was swindled by the lawyers and was scared because she had a brand new baby at the time. I also ask him about the line in the article that says that she lived with her husband in the area and he said that's BS, she's never been married.

In October, they file a quit claim deed, create a trust making me the executor, amended it making her the executor, and filed an application for marriage all within a 2 day period. He fell again in November requiring surgery on his foot. He needed a second surgery December 22. The next day was the day the marriage application was to expire, but they got married.

That injury continued to give him a hard time the whole following year, and their relationship continued to be rocky. They didn't tell her 10 year old son that they got married until April, and even after that they didn't sleep in the same room despite what my grandpa wanted. 6 months in there is documentation that he was unhappy that they hadn't had sex.

November and December he was in and out of the hospital for various issues. They found a brain tumor, and pancreatic cancer. He was confused and unable to speak for much of that time due to medications and pain. He died in April of 2025.

She was the trustee when he died. I asked many times how I can help, who I can call, etc. but nothing ever happened. She put their house on the market before having a lawyer. Beneficiaries were never contacted, documents were never found, financials were never disclosed. I got a lawyer in August and in December I got the letters of testamentary after I discovered that she has 4 felonies of theft from a vulnerable adult and therefore was never able to be the trustee.

In the time since, I've discovered that she put at least $30k on his credit cards that were only in his name within only 2 months after he died. I have also found that my grandpa is the third elderly man she's scammed. She and her two sisters all do this. I have documentation for all of it. The house, which is listed under the name of the trust, but I haven't had any involvement, is now pending. There was a trust account set up to have at least $75k in it, but it's down to $400. Around $120k was removed to their joint account over the course of a year with many of the removals happening during his hospital stays.

So sorry for all that background, but it is the only way to make sure I get the most accurate answers to my question.

1. Should I file a TEDRA to put a lien on the house until this is settled? Is there a different way to handle this? My lawyer says it'll be $5k to do this, I'm a teacher.. I don't have a lot of money and that is a lot to waste if nothing comes of this.

2. I don't want her to be able to do this to another man or their family. Should I contact a different type of lawyer to go after her criminally?

3. A lot of this would have been avoided if the lawyer who put together the trust had done his due diligence. Can I file a grievance for that?